Praying

Why am I praying

When my worst nightmares still come

True despite my dreams?

 

A.N. I wrote this haiku at a time when I felt that everything in the world was taking a turn for the worst. Although I am unsure about religion and God, I pray regularly as it helps me to reduce my anxiety and to remind me of everything I should be grateful for. However, sometimes I wonder why I and many others feel that praying will make any difference to events outside ourselves, when it has been proved over and over again and terrible things happen regardless of prayer. Doesn’t this make the effectiveness of prayer an illusion – a coincidence? Are prayers just heavenly dreams that cannot keep up with the mass destruction of Earth’s nightmares?

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We Won’t Make It

I’m scared that I won’t make it –

That my future will be crushed out of me

When the engine fails and the plane

Plummets

Down

Down

Down,

Metamorphosing into incandescent wreckage

 

And

 

I’m frightened that he won’t make it –

That he’ll miscalculate. And OVERDOSE.

And at midnight the call won’t be his –

No,

It’ll be from the ambulance crew that

Couldn’t

Save him

 

And

 

I’m terrified that they won’t make it –

That they’ll be run down or stabbed or bombed

Whilstouttogether

And that I’ll lose both my rocks

At once,

Leaving me no ground to

Stand on

 

And

 

I’m just scared that we won’t make it.

 

A.N. I’ve become painfully aware of the fragility of life over the past few weeks, in light of the bombings in Manchester and Afghanistan in addition to other tragedies that I’ve been hearing all over the news. I won’t pretend that it hasn’t affected me, because it has. It’s changed my whole outlook: I no longer see the days of myself and others as unlimited, but numbered; I no longer believe that these news stories won’t happen in my own world, because my Earth and that Earth are the same. In some way, it is good to be in touch with this reality as it means that I am a lot more appreciative of what I have. On the other hand, though, I recognise that I can’t let these happenings distract me from making the most out of my life. After all, if I can stay level-headed then perhaps I can make a change to even a fraction of this mess.